Off My Chest

Rant #137

I have something I need to get off my chest. I've been carrying around my irritation over the subject for weeks now, fuming over it, being annoyed by it, and seeking validation from my friends about it. Several weeks back, I attended a get-together and was asked to provide something to the meal. After careful evaluation of what others were bringing, I opted for a favorite side dish of mine, and some cupcakes for dessert.

Now, before I get into the dirty details, I should say that I have a rule for Brielle at my house. We all know that kids can say some random things, at random times, so our rule is this:  

If you're given food you do not like, or do not care for, politely say "no thanks."  DO NOT criticize the cook, or express words of disgust to anyone. Keep it to yourself.

As goes the conversation with a teenage boy I did not know as I help myself to a second serving (I know, shame on me) of my favorite side dish (name of side dish to be omitted, to avoid incrimination)...

BOY:  "You don't want those."

ME:  "Why?"

BOY:  "Because they are tasteless."

ME:  "Excuse me?" (completely shocked)

BOY:  "They are the most tasteless, disgusting (side dish) I've ever had. You really don't want to have any."

ME:  "I'm sorry?" (confusion sets in and anger starts to brew)

BOY:  "I'm not joking.  They're gross."

(I point to the cupcakes)

ME:  "What if the same person that made those, made (side dish)?"

BOY:  "That's not possible."

ME:  "Ya sure about that? (now, I'm furious)

BOY:  "The person who made those cupcakes could never had made (side dish)."

I shoved the largest bite of (side dish) in my mouth, exaggerating my every move, and stormed out of the kitchen. And then ate 2 cupcakes, which surprisingly, did not make me feel better.

At least Thumper's mom taught him right. "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all!"

There.  I feel better now.