January 16, 2010
When I go back to that day, I still can't believe what happened. But I do remember how it started. An overly-confident "wanna-be" cowgirl stepped into a snow covered pasture to show off her daughters new pony to visiting family. Just like she'd done more than a dozen times before ("she" being "me"), she haltered her horse and began leading him to the barn.
I should have know something was wrong when Cocoa immediately dropped to the ground just to jump back up and start freaking out. Have you ever seen a horse freak out? Up close? My inexperience immediately led me to pass him off to Chris, which was the right thing to do. What I did next, wasn't so much...
"A word to the wise ain't necessary, it's the stupid ones that need advice." -- Bill Cosby
I let my thoughts and my head leave the pasture in that moment, even though my body did not. In a matter of seconds, I became completely unaware of what was happening with the horse behind me. Not only did I endanger myself, by my sister, her kids and my daughter as well.
In an attempt to regain control of a freaking out horse, I made some poor decisions, thinking I knew just what to do. It was stupid really.
And it was a painful (and expensive) lesson to learn... one that should have been part of my own common sense. Now I know that horses are large, powerful and unpredictable. I've also become acutely aware of where the horses are, at all times, when I'm with them.
"The past is a ghost, the future a dream, and all we ever have is now." -- Bill Cosby
Clearly, Chris and Brielle realized this sooner than myself. This picture was taken just a few shorts weeks after the accident. I don't remember the exact conversation of that day, but I'm sure it was something along the lines of "when a horse bucks you off, you get right back on." We knew that we couldn't let Brielle fear her horse, but as you can see, I made sure to keep my distance. I expected my child to grasp the concept, but as a 30 year old adult, I couldn't do it.
My dream then was the same as it is today. I want to ride the horses when ever I want and where ever I want. I want to prepare the horses all by myself, without any help from Chris. Since that day, I have yet to ever do so. My dream is not to be a "wanna-be" anymore. I want to be the real deal, do it all myself and more importantly, not be afraid to do it type of cowgirl.
June 28, 2012
The horses hooves needed some care, so our Farrier (horseshoe guy -- I seriously just googled "what to call the person who puts horseshoes on horses" to find that out) came by the house to give horses a good trimming. I had to time his arrival just right, because I have never caught and haltered the horses myself, without Chris, since that day two and a half years ago.
When I told Chris that the Farrier was coming and that he needed to help me get the horses ready, he immediately looked frustrated. And for good reason. It was 100 degrees out, and Chris had just spent the entire day working outside in the blazing heat. Without him saying a word, I realized I was missing out on a lot of great opportunities with these horses because I was using him as a crutch. He knew it -- I knew it.
June 30, 2012
The farrier told me before leaving that I needed to treat the horses hooves every single day. This dry heat with no rain means there's no moisture in the ground. Imagine what your feet would look like if you walked around outside, all day, with no shoes. Poor ponies.
With the work load that Chris is experiencing right now, I knew that this responsibility would fall completely on me. He just doesn't have the time.
"Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it." --Bill Cosby
My heart was pounding. My hands and legs were shaking. I was probably holding my breathe. I walked in the pasture with Cocoa's halter, knowing I had to catch him first if I wanted any shot of catching Dandy. Chris was at work.
Cocoa haltered easily but Dandy made me work for it a little. I got them tied off, then sat on a hay bale to calm my nerves, slow my heart, and prepare myself for my next task. Essentially, I had to paint a moisturizer on their hooves. Which meant lifting and holding 8 separate hooves.
I must have looked intoxicated walking back to the house after releasing them back in the pasture. I could not get my legs to stop shaking and started crying when my overload of emotions got the best of me. I'm not joking -- I cried. Chris had just arrived home when I walked into the house and he immediately thought something had happened.
Something did happen today. I faced my fears. Fears that have paralyzed me for longer than they should have. I've been deathly afraid of my dream (as silly as my dream may seem to some), but today, I wanted my dream more.
Special Thanks to Bill Cosby.
1 comment:
Hat off to you Emily, that is very cool!
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