3.10.2013

Teaching the Tough Lessons

This is my iPad.


Sad, I know. Especially since I'm 6 days away from my next business trip AND had just purchased the 10th installment of the "Women's Murder Club" series. Curse word.

Brielle did it. She didn't mean to, and I know that. But, had she listened to her mother at the time of the "incident," the "incident" would not have occurred. It was time for the lesson on "Taking Responsibility for your Actions."

We've had several opportunities for this particular lesson before, however, none of them came with such hefty price tag for repair. Chris immediately (in the heat of the moment) grounded her for a week. I disagreed with this line of punishment. ***Word to the wise... don't disagree on punishments in front of your child.  The anger from the broken iPad will quickly turn to anger from having undermined the co-parent.***

Brielle is a good kid who made a mistake, simple as that. She had a little party at our house scheduled for the next day, and I didn't feel as though the other kids (and Brielle, for that matter), should be punished for what we both knew was an accident.  Besides, what would grounding do, except punish me, too? No thanks (and sorry babe).

Instead, the punishment needed to better aline with the crime.  I felt that paying for the repairs was not only be appropriate, but a good reminder that these technology devices are fragile and expensive. They are privilege to have and need to be cared for. I helped Brielle set up a repayment plan. She immediately transferred some money from her savings account to my checking account, and will lose her allowance over the next 8 weeks. She also asked her dad for opportunities to help him and earn some money. I was proud of her for owning up to her mistake.

I then went to my room and cried. Who wants to take money from their kid?!?  It broke my heart.

Sundays are paydays. So today, this lesson hit home from her. When handing in her job chart and after calculating what was still owed to me, she burst into tears.  The realization of just how much money it will cost her, and how long and hard she'll have to work became all too real.  A part of me wanted to hug her and say "never mind - don't worry about it."  But, I can already see that this particular lesson, although tough to teach and tough for her to learn, is sinking in.  She gets it now.

No comments: